The picture. .

I was just walking to the bus stop
To go some place else
The day pleasant
The sun coming down
I began thinking about the usuals
Like
What was coming up this week
Or like how things have changed
Any birthdays that coming up etc etc
I get into the bus
And sit on my favourite seat
Just next to the window
The moving traffic
And those bright yellow lights
Just then my mind rewinds to a few things
Happened in the past
Whose shadows always follow
Even a year or more
Later
Some how I feel
Things have not changed
They are all the same
Whether I am Home
Or Away
The same names crop up in conversations
Same names stay on your contact and speed dial lists
Same names come in newspapers
If not the same
Then its Related
Either those names are related to you directly
Those names are no more related to you
But now related to your friends
Sometimes I don't know how to take it
Should I just move ahead
Thinking eventually I will out grow it
Like the time I out grew my clothes
Or should I just try really hard
To erase these pictures?
Feels like I have called this upon myself
By drawing on the wrong page of my life
First painted with all the lovely colours
Then changing my mind
And painting them
Black and White
And now
Wonder if I would be better off
Just tearing them
Into so many pieces
Amounting to
The number of times these pictures
Caused Pain
To
My Past
Causing Pain
To
My Present
Might Cause Pain
To
My Future

Attachment causes detachment

I feel horrible inside
It is not how I had left it like
Anymore
It is now what I feared
Guess everyone goes through this period
Where they make new friends
And lose some old ones
I feel now I am in a new city altogether
Its no more familiar to me
Everything seems fake.
Like a facade.
There is no more sharing of joy n sadness
There is only concealment
There is no more openness in welcoming
And no more sadness in bidding
Everybody has moved on
Everybody has a life of their own
Nobody turns back to look at those happy times
Guess they too made friends
And thats why lost few..
I don't know how different things would have been
If I stayed back
And I am unaware of
How things would drastically change
If I stayed there any longer
I am now stuck in between two cities
The 'old' or my 'new'
And now I know its high time
I make new friends
And try not to lose my old ones!
Its high time I too move on
And make my life

Now I know the game of life
Attachment causes detachment

its there

I am in this new place
There are thousands of people around
I am lost in the crowd
And every time I am in these closed walls
I am lone
I cannot help thinking of home
My fraends and the old city
I tell myself you have to move on
And get used to this new world
Of people where
Love is just a four letter word
Friend is just a five
And there is no family
They are mere words
And no life
They see only of how you look
And how you dress
And if you fit in the 15 yr old's clothes
They see if you know anything about drinks
And what assignments to complete
Its all you are alive for
Back home there is
Love which is all we share
Friends very rare
And family !
Where they await for your arrival
Where they dont see your 2 year old jean
And where they don't even notice if you
Are thin or fat
Where they wait for those warm hugs
And hearty laughter
Where they care and share.

Its not something I can take anymore
I wish to come back soon
Or
Wish for something good
I could wait
But feel impossible to wait for long...

i left it all back

I left it all back there
For a new start
But when i come here
I realise that the end has just begun
I miss all the laughter
and all the fun
I miss those falling tears
And the warming hugs
I miss those fancy fraends
And that fancy fverld
I miss putting the plan
And shakrafree gum
I miss those moments today
and all i want to say
Is I love you guys all my life
I'll give anything you say
I'll keep it all together
I'll give it all my time
you guys are simply the best
And are all fancily mine

:D

I never knew

I never knew
Things could work the other way round
I never knew
I would grow up this fast
I never knew
I would some day realise what is past is past
I never knew
Life was really a discovery by itself
I never knew
This was just the beginning
I never knew
It wouldn't be so tough to pass this test
I never knew
There was no harm in what i really wanted to do
I never knew
There is something else at the back of my mind
I never knew
That this is what i really wanted deep down my heart
I never knew
Things were much better this way
I never knew
That one day it was all this i would say!

HERE

'Here' is where i am today
Not knowing what to do
Assessing what is right
And what wrong
What is good
And what bad
What is to be kept
And what to let go
What to relive
And what to forget

'Here' is also a moment
A moment where i could start afresh
A moment filled with substance
A moment adding power
A moment of purification
A moment of peace
A moment of self realisation
A moment of confidence
A moment of truth
A moment of reality
A moment of worth

A moment too precious to let go
Like sand from ones hand

Its a place where I am standing today
Also a moment of what i really am
Where I am me
And Who is the real me.

Dont worry I love you

Its a beautiful summer morning I wake up to
And I am sad
Not because you are gone
But because you are gone even after being there

There is no one to give me a bed coffee
No one to smile and wish me a good morning
I lay on my bed
Looking at the weather outside

There is no sign of sleep in my eyes
Even after having not slept all night
There is only sign of hope
Which too shows me no sign of light

I look at the skies so clear
Wish I could be like it
Very clear,Not confused
But I am human and not nature

I look at the trees
So fresh and green
And look at me wearing away
Pale skin and dark under eyes

I look at the birds
Flying high
And I feel caged
I don't know why

I just know that if someone were here
I could reach really high
And look down and say
" I am not alone "

And realise that
That Someone was really me
Just plain me
And then I say to myself
" Don't worry. I love you "